A Matter of Time

There must have always been a part of him that had always known. They'd always been thick as thieves, certainly, but their bond had long gone beyond the realm of best friends. For as long as James could remember, they'd called each other brother and that had suited them nicely. It hadn't often been acknowledged, but they both had known that it went beyond even that. They were the same person--halves that needed the other to be whole.  

Even when James had been chasing after Lily, the proclaimed love of his life, Sirius had always been his soul mate. There wasn't a question that their they would live their lives together or that they would die the same day--how else would it possible for the world to keep spinning otherwise? It seemed silly to him now that he'd chased after someone else, someone that hadn't even shown any signs of liking him, while ignoring what was right in front of him.

The moment he clued in was a fond memory. The first time that they kissed had been the most natural thing in the world. It'd begun as a challenge, but, as determinedly as it started, it quickly shifted into something else. They'd pressed closer and found themselves gripping each other tightly from the intensity of it all. It'd taken them a little while after that, toeing the line beyond friendship, to come to the realization that they were both what the other wanted. After that, all that was left was a reckless plunge.

It was the nights like this, when Sirius lay sleeping in his arms and he could just quietly admire him, that the love in James' chest would bubble over and overwhelm him. Sirius was so painfully gorgeous, yearned by so many, but James was the only know that knew that his beauty went so far beyond anything their eyes could see. He was the only one that had ever seen beyond the veil of confidence and certainty to the damage that lay beneath. He was the only one that had ever seen the tears and pain in his eyes, when the harsh reality of Sirius' life would break his stubborn resolve. He was the only one ever trusted enough to pick up the pieces and carefully put him back together, adding bits of himself whenever there was a gap that had been left behind.

He'd given so much of himself to Sirius over the years that he was surprised it taken him so long to figure it out--it had always been him. They had been bonded forever in the length of a train ride. The thought made him smile and lean in to press a soft kiss to the top of Sirius' head, his thumb gently caressing the soft locks at his temple. It'd really only been a matter of time.